Congress heard testimony from officials from the National Intelligence Estimate Wednesday who told lawmakers Vladimir Putin is paranoid, isolated and dangerous and he could lash out and go nuclear. I simply can't believe it's already World War III season. I still have my Omicron decorations up.
Runner's World this month prescribed jogging as the most heart healthy exercise for aging Baby Boomers. It so happens I tripped hard jogging in Beverly Hills Sunday night and bruised my ribs. I told the doctor on the phone it really hurts when I laugh, so he told me not to watch Biden for two weeks.
The Washington Post urged TCM hosts to warn viewers before it runs Gone with the Wind, Birth of a Nation, or Woody Allen's Manhattan during TCM's Oscars month. Art cannot go un-supervised. Next, TCM will be pressured to stop airing the Wizard of Oz because it is offensive people without brains.
President Biden acknowledged that he will authorize the import of more oil from Saudi Arabia to help lower gas prices. He tried to call the Saudi Crown Prince Tuesday, but the call was not picked up. His handlers will let Joe try again today, only this time with the cell phone instead of with the remote.
National Public Radio aired a story defending people who feel compelled to keep wearing masks post-pandemic to display societal resolve or government support. The pandemic may be over, but the virtue signaling goes on. I still wear my mask to protect pregnant men in Ukraine from climate change.
California Secretary of State Shirley Weber said that slavery reparations from the state should be limited to descendants of slaves in the United States, and not for African Americans who have more recently arrived. I now completely believe in reparations. If you voted for Biden, you owe me gas money.
Kamala Harris mistakenly announced in Poland Sunday the U.S. stands with Ukraine in support of NATO. Ukraine is not in NATO, so we're not required to fight the Russians. The White House sent Kamala Harris to Eastern Europe to prevent World War III so I'm pretty sure we're all going to die.
Dr. Fauci returned to the cable news talk shows Sunday to give his medical assessment of the latest viral threat and its symptoms. He said sweating over the pump while filling up and getting sick over high gas prices are the symptoms of the latest pandemic to sweep the world. It's called Car Owner Virus.
President Biden said higher gas prices are caused by Putin's war and not green energy policy. If gas prices in L.A. get any higher, it may be worth it to fly to Ukraine and defeat the Russians myself. Putin countered with his own statement Sunday saying yes, he is evil, but higher gas prices are on Biden.
The DEA reports Mexican gangs are buying drugs from China and flooding the U.S. with opioids by trucking the drugs across the border in vegetable crates. Last weekend the Border Patrol discovered three million dollars of meth hidden inside a shipment of onions. It's enough to bring tears to your eyes.
The White House continued blaming Russia for high gas prices Monday as Republican activists started registering potential voters at gas pumps. Even the CDC has weighed in on the skyrocketing price of gas. They told Americans that if everybody doesn't drive for two weeks, we can flatten the curve.
President Biden will be flying to Europe for meetings this week following a fast medical checkup before the overseas trip. He's rumored to be having intestinal problems. It's reported that yesterday they had to take Biden to Bethesda Naval Hospital to see a gastroenterologist because he couldn't stop Putin.